Not looking back in anger

It was hot, especially for a day in September when the British weather could be a bit unkind to anyone planning to be outside. I forget if was due to the heat or maybe due to the long coat tails but I was sweating a little, but then it could have simply been nerves. My brother placed a clammy hand on my shoulder for reassurance but he seemed even more nervous than me, no doubt worried about giving a speech later in the day, which being dyslexic was not something he was looking forward to.

Friends, family and some relatives who we were only vaguely aware of but needed to be invited just to keep the peace started taking their seats, our nephews were doing a wonderful job of putting people they knew up front and anyone else where they saw fit. My brother grinned at me and said that we would have had time for a second pint in the pub over the road after all but my bladder was happy that we had given it a miss and my mother told me to turn around so I couldn’t see my bride arrive.

There I waited for what felt like an eternity; in fact it was only minutes. Outside I could already hear the big six liter engine of the 1920’s Bentley that was being used as our wedding car, which meant she hadn’t run away, a joke I heard repeated around the church within seconds of thinking it to myself.

I couldn’t help but look around as my soon to be wife walked down the aisle, I grinned like a Cheshire cat unable to believe how lucky I was to be marrying this kind-hearted and sexy woman who had changed my life over the seven years leading up to this moment, I was the luckiest man alive.

On that day, in front of everyone we hold dear we both vowed to love, honour and cherish one another for the rest of our lives, and agreed that forsaking all others we would be faithful to each other.

That was in 2005, today I wonder where it went wrong, I still get as excited as I did then when I see my wife, she is still the woman I dream about but somewhere along the line it stopped being the same for her, somewhere she forgot about the vows we made and did not forsake all others. She decided to take that precious love we felt that day and share it with someone else. I don’t know when she lost her way or why it happened, maybe I will in time and maybe I am never supposed to find out. Sadly our story isn’t very different to that of so many people but I at least will remember one of the happiest moments of my life day with a smile, even if perhaps she doesn’t.

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