Why we should ban the office Christmas Party

Offices are a strange place; they are very much like a school playground. They all have a bully, and of course someone for them to pick on, they all have a geek or a nerd of some description not to mention the guarantee that every office will have a weirdo who most people try to avoid. Of course just like any other playground around the world the office will also have the cool kids, the class favourite and let us not forget the “pretty ones” the good-looking, popular people who always seem to be at the heart of the action. Offices are no different from being at school with the possible exception that at an office we cannot be excused from a meeting by bringing in a note from our mum.

One thing you just can’t mix with this sort of environment is alcohol. Such an action would be so stupid it would compare to throwing in a match into a firework factory and wondering why it blew up in your face or pissing into the wind and realising that your shoes are wet (that last one is really for us men but who am I to judge) So why on earth do we insist on having the office Christmas party?

Why would you put this mix of people who spend their whole day stuck in a building together wishing they were somewhere else into a tiny room full of beer, wine, bad food and a cheesy DJ with an ABBA compilation?

Why are people surprised that by giving everyone attending drink vouchers and a late bar that the “office harmony” is somewhat different come the first working day the New Year?

My wife’s affair, like so many others around the world started at one of these parties, it was 2007, not that really makes a difference. I dare say that drink, dancing and whatever else was thrown in all contributed to the start of things, of course she could have come home, told me about it, said sorry and that would have been the end but she didn’t  instead she decided to carry on seeing the other man until only recently.

So with the Christmas season well and truly upon us and with the first Friday of December approaching I dare say that there will be thousands of these wonderful parties going on around the world and I have this to say to any employers out there right now. Forget the Christmas parties they are more trouble than they are worth, they cost a fortune and have the potential to ruin lives by putting people into a situation they are not used to dealing with, simply give all your staff £50 in a card with a bottle of wine and wish them a merry Christmas which will keep everyone happy and you will be the good guy for a change. Much more importantly by doing this you will potentially avoid someone else’s life being ruined somewhere down the line and the “office harmony” will be much better off for your actions



4 thoughts on “Why we should ban the office Christmas Party

  1. Applause. Or possibly having no alcohol but I guess there would be no fun in that. I would like to think we should exercise more self-control and actually know where our boundaries lie. On a lighter note…I like Abba but don’t hold that against me 🙂 .

    1. Oh dear, ABBA, I will try not to hold it against you but there are limits even to my ability to forgive and of course a party without alcohol is no more than an AA meeting but I still think the office bash is a disaster in the making
      Regards “I”

  2. I agree 100%. My husbands company holiday parties always included spouses, it was the business forum meetings out of town and trips to customer sites out of state that led to my husbands infidelities. He never cheated in his own zip code!!! If you mix men and women and booze, you’ve got a bunch of people who already spend a lot of time together and are comfortable with each other, now with lowered inhibitions, what they heck do you think is going to happen? I personally don’t think men and women working together is healthy, certainly drinking together leads to ruination.

    1. Hi, Thanks for the comment / agreement. Strangely our roles are reversed, I am the one who travels the world work wise and my wife remains in the UK, but I do believe that if it was not for this chance encounter that things may never have had the opportunity to progress to the stage they did, mind you I’m not sure I would go as far as separating men and women in the workplace it has taken long enough to create something close to equality as it is but i understand why you would say that.

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